Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.
America. Seriously. What the hell are you thinking? What the hell. Did you not pay attention to the last 4 years? WERE YOU NOT FUCKING PAYING ATTENTION?
I'm sorry, I'm yelling.
This is an excerpt from an e-mail I just sent. I'm cutting and pasting:
"I cried in my car last night. I was driving to my friend Princess' house because he was watching the election with some of my other friends and I was surrounded by non-citizens and one libertarian at my place, so I had to take off.
And in the car I just started crying. Granted, not all of the electoral votes were in, but it wasn't looking good. I thought to myself "I can't live in a country that would vote for a person like George W. A place that would be so ignorant and so blinded by religion, lies and fear." I thought this was a country that promised to help dreams come true if you worked hard and pledged to the flag at least once a month and brushed your teeth in a circular fashion.
But I still don't have health insurance, my right to choose is at stake (still), some of my friends are in a country fighting a war that they don't believe in but have to fight because they need to pay for college, and basic civil liberties are denied to citizens of this country.
All amendments for gay marriage were banned? WHO ARE WE? WHAT ARE WE TELLING OURSELVES? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO BASIC FUCKING HUMAN RIGHTS?
I convinced myself that I was going to move to Canada. Vancouver apparently has a really great theatre scene.
As I watched the results come in I got angrier and angrier. I had to excuse myself from the room once or twice because my vibe was obviously saturating the room. When I got home and finally went to bed at 2AM I put my head on my pillow and unclenched my jaw. I was sad, disappointed... the anger had given away to shame. I am so ashamed that my America has elected this man back into office. That they CHOSE to have him back. I am just so ashamed.
And I don't want to be ashamed of America. It hurts to feel this way. I am comforted that half the voting population agree with me, but it doesn't make the fact disappear.
So this is what I've promised myself for the next 4 years. I am going to watch W. like a hawk. I will write my congressperson when I'm angry, I will slap bumper stickers on the back of my Merc, I will speak out when I know I need to."
I will make this shame disappear by practicing my American right to speak freely, to pursue happiness and to fight for what I believe in.
Thank you for voting, America. Yes, even those of you that voted for Bush, I'm thanking you as well because you are practicing exactly what you believe in and I applaud you for doing so.
But so help me God and other deities of higher power, I will not let your president stop me from loving my country. I will make damn fucking sure that this anger and disappointment and shame will be used for good instead of evil. I am going to fight against bigotry, ignorance and fear for the next 4 years. I didn't do enough these past 4 years. I'm not going to let this happen again.
I will not be frightened by your terrorism, ultra-conservative Republicans. You do not scare me. Your values, your actions, your closed minds frighten me, but you will not scare me into silence.
I have to walk away from the keyboard for a second because I'm really worked up.
I'm cool now.
Here's what I'm asking you, the general public. Educate yourself. Even if you are the smartest of the smart, get a little smarter. Watch not only the President, watch your local courts, your local congress people, your representatives... watch all branches of government because every magician has a way to distract you so you don't see the slight of hand. Don't be so taken by the Presidency that you don't see the tricks being played elsewhere.
Please do it.
I usually don't use the LadeeLeroy as a sounding board for my political stands... (okay maybe once or twice), but I'm giving you the heads up that I may come here and vent Liberal Left style for the next four years. Be prepared.
I love America. That's why I'm so angry.