Check this shit out.
I bought that swag lamp. No, not for $59.99. No, not for $35.99. No, you're wrong again my friend...
I got this lovely piece of sweet decor for the low low price of $5.50.
E-bay. I may want to have a mad affair with you. I want to make out with your merchandise in the office supply closet when no one is looking. I want to run my khaki-clad leg along your search engine and feel my heart quicken as I count down the seconds of my auction. Constantly pressing refresh refresh resfresh until there is nothing to refresh... just something to claim as my OWN.
Yeah. I know. That lamp is dead ass fugly... but I LOVE IT. This is how my house is decorated.. I've got these swag lamps everywhere. We just got the 40 gallon aquarium up and running. That's right people. A 40 gallon aquarium.
That makes a total of four (4) aquariums in the house. A total of 80 gallons of water chilling out in the domicile.
Someone told me that aquariums are white trash.
But imagine a 40 gallon aquarium with two swag lamps hanging over it.
That's not Trashy. It's Clashy.
My co-worker says I have Pedophile Trash taste, as in "come into my retro house... would you like to come down to the basement to check out my goldfish? How about a piece of candy out of my vaginal-shaped pink candy dish?"
I prefer the term Ecclectic. But hell, if ecclectic means being Pedophile Trash, that's what I'm going to be.
Because I love the swag.
HELLS YEAH SWAG, I LOVE YOUOOOOOOOO!