LADEELEROY

2002-09-10

GUESTBOOK
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A Year Ago I Wasn't Who I Am Now
 
  This time last year I had no idea what was coming my way.

All I knew was that I'd been totally duped and felt stupid for not realizing earlier how duped I was about to be.

I didn't know that in the next 12 hours that September 11th was going to become what it is. I didn't know that I was going to fall in love in less than three weeks. I didn't know that I was going to become a stronger, wiser person because of everything.

To this day, I have no clue what Ace of Ass is doing nor do I really care.

But I do need to thank him. Explanation will follow.

The other day I was in the car with Lipman when we passed the coffee shop that we met in.

"Hey there's Flipnotics... that's where we met a year ago."

Lipman looked and squeezed my leg.

"That's where it all started Bunty."

And I sat in the car, ignoring the way Lipman drives as it makes me nervous and remembered why I was at Flipnotics a year ago.

Have you ever heard of a guy named Eric Hokkannen? If not, no biggie, it's probably best that you don't as it maintains his status as Best Kept Music Secret In Austin.

Ace of Ass introduced me to Tuesday Eric Night's at Flipnotics. The week Ace of Ass went to LA to tour with his band and his cock, I decided I would go and watch some good music.

I called all my friends to tell them they could meet me at Flipnotics.

None of them showed up.

But that was fine, as I am one of those chicks that enjoys life even when she is alone and perched myself in a chair towards the back with a Dos XX and my groove.

I noticed Lipman when he walked in. There was no beaming light following him. There weren't cherubs puking on his shoulder or birds carrying a cape behind him.

It was just Lipman and his skinny legs and his big feet and his beautiful eyes.

He was the only other person there that was by himself. Other than that, nothing really stood out about him.

I do remember that he sat in the back row with me, four chairs down. I do remember breifly thinking to myself, "Crap. That guy's going to hit on me because I'm alone and he's alone." I do remember later forgetting that thought and totally having my own dance party in my chair.

"I thought you were on Cocain or something when I first met you because you had this crazy electric energy flowing off of you. Your entire body was dancing, but you were sitting down. It was hard not to notice," Lipman would tell me later.

I was high. Not on drugs or the beer. I was high on the music. Fucking fantastic music. I was high on the fact that I was in an awkward sexual situation with Ace of Ass but was still able to enjoy myself, alone. Fucking fantastic feeling, intuition... it tells you that everything is going to be all right even when you know that it's not right at the moment.

I got up during one of the breaks to walk outside and enjoy a lip lock with a Camel Ultra Light.

As I got up, I could feel Lipman watching me. I could feel his eyes on the back of my neck, on the back of my scalp, on the back of my ass as I left the room.

But I didn't care because I was just so incredibly enthralled with the moment of feeling that everything was okay. That the planets were aligned correctly. That the Universe had Big Plans and that I was not directly a part of them, but would nonetheless be affected in the most positive way.

I will admit that my ass tightened a bit when Lipman came outside, too. I will admit that my heart fluttered a bit when I made eye contact with him for the first time when he asked if he could bum a smoke. I will admit that I was charmed by the accent and the tone of his voice and his ability to make me feel comfortable with a complete and total stranger.

Have you ever been in contact with someone and you're having a conversation and you look right into their eyes and it hurts?

I mean literally HURTS your heart in the most wonderful aching sort of way to where it's just too much to keep looking at their eyes?

It was like that with Lipman that first time I met him.

The conversation was just normal chitchat. It was almost like old friends running into each other at the super market after not being in contact with them for 10 years. Every detail he told me about himself my brain stored away.... not on purpose, it just sort of happened that way.

As the music started up again, I invited him back inside and bought him a beer.

And another beer. And then the night ended and all I had left afterwards was his name, the name of his band, and that he was playing at the Elephant Room on September 18th.

"When I left, I kept telling myself that I should turn around and get your number. I got home and I thought about walking back to see if I could find you. I told my father the minute I walked into the kitchen that I 'met the most amazing individual.' He laughed at me because I had said almost the same thing about the girl who'd I just dumped a week prior.," Lipman would relate later on.

When I got home to my apartment, I sat in the doorframe and lit another cigarette and picked up the phone to call Wakey.

She was reassuring me that all would be fine with Ace of Ass ... if he knew what was good for him.

"But the thing is Wakey, there are other fish in the sea. Like, I met this guy at Flipnotics and totally hit it off with him. No problem. It was easy, it was comfortable. It was all good."

"It's all good cause you're all good. You're Mother Fucking Ladee Leroy!," she said.

Ah, that Wakey.

That night, I fell asleep and drempt of Lipman. Lipman and I in Italy. Swimming in the canals. Just the two of us. I took it as a sign.

A sign that even if Ace of Bass were to evolve to Ace of Ass, there were other fish in the sea. Other fish that I could swim with.

A week later, Ace of Ass e-mailed me the letter explaining his shagging ways. A week and a day later, the Twin Towers fell. A week and two days later I turned into a hermit and didn't leave my apartment except for working and eating purposes.

Two weeks later, I went to Lipman's show on the 18th.

All of this happened a year ago.

And so much more.


So thanks, Ace of Ass. Thanks for being the dick that you were. But also thanks for having good music taste. Otherwise, I woulda never been at Flipnotics to meet the guy I'm in love with now. Hope that you realize what you missed out on. Hope that you know that I am now aware of how close I came to missing out on one of the best experiences of my life.

Thanks for not being the one.

 
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Copyright 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 L.Leroy